Thursday, November 20, 2008
MULTIPLE TIME ZONES LATER…

You know you're not in Nova Scotia when...
Snow flakes are sprinkling Nova Scotia and here I am in Hawaii. John and I packed up our gear and took off for the Wikiki beach early this morning, I in my bathingsuit, he fully dressed. John does not go in for the wet stuff unless it comes with steam, soap and a side of towels whereas I am pure fish. Tres finny. So, there I am in my element frolicking beside toasted surfers with my white legs scaring off the wildlife while he lounges on the side looking like Tommy Bahama escaping from the boardroom.

A day at the beach, John-style
I cannot possibly show a photo of myself in my bathingsuit for risk of causing somekind of Internet collapse but I do have this one of me in my coverups standing beside a banyan tree with the lovey doves all around. Please note that it appears as though one is perching on my shoulder. Not so. However, my legs (blissfully out of sight) are nearly the exact shade of said dove. I'm sure there's a message in this, something rich in symbolic meaning, but it escapes me for the moment. If my expression looks a little perplexed it is only because I am having one of my typical dialogues with the photographer. He is urging me to take my hand off my hat while I implore him to just take the picture. this goes on for several moments and the struggle leaves me looking a bit stunned.

Jane in hat by banyan tree
Speaking of stunned, as I trot around the world, dropping into restaurants and cafes for meals, it has occurred to me that life has grown far more complicated in the simplest of ways. For example: washroom signage. When did it go out of fashion to use the words 'Men' and 'Women' on washroom doors? Try stumbling around multiple timezones, have yourself a supper at 2:30 am according to your bodyclock, only to find yourself staring blankly at a washroom door trying to decipher the his and the hers? How many fig leaves do I need, anyway? One or three? And what is that cute little picture really saying (like, is that a she in a sarong or a he in a kilt?) Just tell me, already!
In any case, tonight I'm heading to the Cheesecake Factory for dulce leche cheesecake. I'm not even going to use the "I'm on vacation" line for an excuse to eat such a decadent dessert because I can't: technically I'm on life and life is better with cheesecake.
Next posting I will be several pounds heavier and writing from Australia.
Happy Thanksgiving all my American friends....
Posted by Jane on
11/20 at 09:52 PM
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